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How to avoid romance scams.
First and last name.
The playbook scammers use — and the checks that stop them cold.
Updated July 31, 2026 · evidence and safety review
Quick answer
To avoid romance scams: never send money to someone you haven't met, insist on a spontaneous video call, reverse-image their photos, and verify their identity against public records. Any request for money, gift cards, or crypto is the decisive red flag.
Romance scams cost victims hundreds of millions each year, and the scripts are remarkably consistent. Knowing the pattern is most of the defense.
The script, stage by stage
It starts with an attractive profile and fast, intense affection («love bombing»). Then a reason they can't meet or video-call — deployed overseas, working on an oil rig, camera broken. Then, once you're attached, an emergency that only money can solve. Recognizing the stages early is how you step off the ride.
Red flags that should stop you
Refusal to video-call; a story that conveniently prevents meeting; professions of love within days; and — the decisive one — any request for money, gift cards, or crypto «investment help». No genuine partner you've never met needs your bank details.
How to verify before you're hurt
Reverse-image their photos. Search their username, email, or phone — a real person shows years of consistent footprint; a scammer's identity is thin and new. Our fake-profile guide has the full 7-signal checklist, and you can run a catfish check directly.
If you've already sent money
Stop contact, keep everything, and report to the FTC (reportfraud.ftc.gov) and FBI IC3 (ic3.gov). Call your bank immediately — some transfers can be reversed. Don't pay «to recover» funds; that's the follow-up scam.
Why smart people still fall for it
Romance scams don't target the gullible — they target the trusting, often during loneliness or grief. Scammers invest weeks building genuine-feeling intimacy before the first ask, so by the time money comes up, the victim is emotionally committed and rationalizing. That's why external verification matters: your instincts are exactly what the scam is engineered to disarm. A footprint check is a fact your feelings can't argue with.
Key takeaways
- Never send money to someone you haven't met in person.
- «Broken camera» every time is a deployment of the script.
- Reverse-image photos and verify the footprint.
- Report to FTC and IC3; call your bank fast if you paid.
Reviewed by the Recordwell editorial team · Updated July 31, 2026. Safety guidance is reviewed against primary references.
Scope: this guide explains a research method, not a conclusion about any person. Public information can be incomplete, delayed, or attached to a namesake.
Identity: compare more than one independent field before treating two records as the same person. A shared name, photo, or city is a clue, not proof.
Decision: confirm consequential information with the person or issuing office, and do not use a Recordwell report for employment, tenancy, credit, insurance, or another FCRA-covered decision.
Consumer guidance: compare suspicious behavior with the FTC's scam-avoidance guidance and the FCC's unwanted-call guidance.
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JE
Jordan Ellis
San Mateo, CA · Healthcare
76evidence
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FAQ
Common questions
How do I know if my online partner is a scammer?
The clearest signals: they won't video-call, their story prevents meeting, and money eventually enters the conversation. Verify their identity against public records.
What should I never do with an online-only partner?
Never send money, gift cards, or crypto, and never share bank or ID details — no matter the emergency or how long you've talked.
Can I check if someone is using fake photos?
Reverse image search catches reused photos; a footprint check catches invented identities that image search misses.
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